Sunday, June 27, 2010

Expensive Glance

I entered KFC, placed my order, paid 100 Rs and just glanced around when I happened to see a mesmerising face at the corner table smiling like an angel .My head started processing that divine image putting correctly each pixel to reconstruct in mind while i was still pretending to read  'A La Carte list'.Out of curiosity, I glanced her again with a complete 180 degree view of KFC feigning not to see her specifically as if we just look casually around in a restaurant observing interiors and ambience .

I took my 'Hot and Crispy' Chicken pieces and sat right in front of her table to have ample view of this naturally beautiful panorama.I looked at the piece of Chick-en in my plate and an antique Chick on the next table.Both were hot .I ate chicken at 1/10 th of my usual pace to devote time proportionately on Chick and Chick-en.Finally the Angel left and there were still some leftovers which needed complete justice.

I finished everything and left for home.Half way, I realized that I forgot to get back my 44 Rs at KFC counter.I returned back , explained my case but in vain.Counter boy said convincingly that he had put the cash right on the table and I knew that my pocket is still not having those missing 44 bucks as the only cash I had in my pocket is a 500 Rs note.But there was no way I could prove my point and suspect Counter boy's integrity.

Suddenly that angelic face surfaced in my memory while I was still looking at 'A La Carta' list at the counter and seriously not pretending this time.That benign glance made me skip the last step involved in the basic process of buying an Get rest of your money  back after payment.I returned home without 44 Rs.

A priceless glance of a serene surreal beauty cost me just 44 bucks that day .Really not a bad deal  !

Saturday, May 8, 2010

Rendezvous with ........

With a jubilant face standing at the cliff-end I could really understand the meaning of Acrophobia( Fear of heights ).Soon that Jubilation was replaced by cosmetic sympathetic smile which usually means 'Dont worry buddy ....this moment will be history soon' .I never hesitated to jump-off the cliff as my past fantasies were hovering over my head when I used to imagine myself jumping off like an Olympic Gold Medalist board diver who spins 3 or four times in air with jaw dropping acrobats before vanishing into pool with minimum splash of water.

Without thinking much I jumped to experience that split second of free-fall from height of probably 30 feet.
For a split second , I was numb and within few seconds I was like a dumb.Everything happened so fast that by the time i recollected the chain of events water was rushing via nostrils and ears to comply with the laws of potential gradient.

As I was moving up towards the surface ,I could see a white circular distortion ( Surya Devta ) but suddenly instead of going up to the surface I started falling down.I deliberately closed the nasal gateway to stop inflow of icy-cold Ganges water to prevent replacement of air with more dense state of matter in my wind-pipe ( its not a water hose).

I was trying to hold my breath hoping to come up to the surface in the second hop.3 thoughts came into my mind instantly:

1.I knew some crap has happened which i am going to remember for a very long time.

2.I knew even with this pathetic life jacket and my novice guide(who forgot to check that my Life Jacket is already loose enough to release my soul from body after free fall in a cold water body) around I am not going to die anyways.

3.I had experienced now... how painful it wud be when people drown to death.

But time was running out .I heard noises( Ya u can clearly hear in water In fact u can hear better in water because of the proximity of molecules in water than in air ) 'Arre koi pakdo use' ( Somebody get him ) and I heaved asigh of relief .( although this sigh was an imaginative sigh).

After 3 hops I was out of the water world and thanked Holy Ganges for showering extreme divine love.
Funniest part of this incident. 5 guys standing in queue behind me at the cliff eagerly waiting for their turn ,turnd away ( Including 2 of my friends ) after watching this brief reality show. On regaining my senses I thought of Mountain Dew's Punch line 'Kyonki Darr ke aage hi jeet hai ( On the other side of your greatest fears lies your greatest lives ) and went up to the cliff top again to try my luck for the second time......

Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Ground reality


A cuboidal cement slab has replaced three upright wooden posts. Kids wearing colorful lungis ( a long piece of cloth wrapped around waist) and half pants have claimed the grass-less territory to play the most celebrated sport in India.

Wielding a Thapi ( Stout stick resembling a Cricket Bat , used in some households in India to drive dirt out of wet clothes by pounding  rhythmically), Barefoot batsman stands delighted on the crease unaware of multiple creases on his lungi.

Its 1:30 pm and tiny salty droplets sprouting on my skin was a good indication of the rising mercury taking into consideration that 'Usha' Ceiling fan is already running at maximum rpm.I could see the expressions of joy, excitement,celebrations,dejection ,enthusiasm ,along with high-fives,whistles and huddles braving the temperature of 39.5 degree Celsius.

Well these kids are not expected to play during the wee hours and evening on this Ground because of an unsaid  protocol.Kids in Reebok,Puma and Adidas wearing Nike wrist bands and UCB lycra T-shirts make an entry on bikes and 4 wheeled conveyance to play the most celebrated sport in the prime time slot.

Ground realities have not changed yet.Socio-economic disparity translates automatically to define an invisible authority which is a silent consented consensus among the Haves and Have Nots.

Friday, March 26, 2010

The Barbaric Barber

That 2*2 room witnessed another bloodless carnage of my dead tissues who had hardly seen 20 sunny days.'Here' goes my 'hair' paving way for the next 'heir' to grow again like a new born.

My barbaric barber's twin miniature swords glaring intensely in the fluorescent light of Bajaj CFL was extravagant display of his 'Weapon of Mass Destruction' (Victim :My Keratin bundles).

This episode reminds me of James Cameroon's 3D flick 'Avatar' in which indigenous local tribe Navi's were attacked by aliens ( from Navi's perspective) disturbing the tranquility of the otherwise peaceful Pandora.

Making an analogy at the micro level, the peaceful habitat of local parasites (louse) residing at the top floor of my skeleton on the vast expanse of epidermis must have been disturbed.

If i assume that these tiny wingless insects have some brains and have social hierachy like humans then geeks in the lice community must have calculated by now the periodicity of Apocalyptic attacks .ie 20-25 days .( Well our nerds have predicted the start of Apocalyptic Ceremony in 2012 A.D ).

Leaving aside these alien attacks ,if the lice community continues to exploit the available natural resources ( My Burgundy colored Blood which I have never donated and shiny fertile scalp skin ) then soon this lush dark dense forest ( zilions of ultra slim black filaments :Courtesy Parachute Coconut Oil) will vanish in the time span of next 40-50 years .

If we observe this situation at the macro level probably this is what we are doing to the planet Earth.We are just one of the Infesting Parasitic Species who are primarily responsible for exploiting our generous host (Yes I am talking about the third planet from the Sun) and if we continue to suck its blood like a vampire soon we need to look out for another avenues to keep the human race into existence.

PS: For a louse there are 6,692,030,277 ( hosts) options available but for humans closest known planet outside solar system is 'Epsilon Eridani B' which is 10.4 light year away and nobody knows if we ( I think Vampire is an appropriate term ) can find blood there to satiate our insatiable desires.